Self-awareness is the key

A while back, one of my best friends confessed that over the years I’ve become his inspiration and he hopes to arrive where I am now (mentally) one day. An older friend of mine once told me it fascinates him how well developed my radar for bullshitting seems to be. My flatmate thinks I got my shit together and my then-friend now-partner willingly admits that what drew him in was how sure of my own decisions and opinions I seemed to be. And even though being complemented like this still makes me uncomfortable, a part of me nods in agreement: yes, knowing yourself may be tough as fuck at times, but it does pay off.

It all boils down to self-awareness.

The land of rainbows and unicorns

To me, the time on the verge of February and March marks the time of change. It’s the time when winter finally gives up and one can smell spring approaching. The days become longer, the new energy settles in and I finally feel like I can do things: go out, explore, move, make some new plans, change. It also marks four years since I first moved to Scotland and three years since I’ve started settling in. What a journey that’s been!

Don’t kid yourself

When I moved to Scotland the second time round, a lot of things became apparent to me. One of the biggest realisations was that my best teacher was so damn right: I am a late bloomer. I need more time, but there’s nothing wrong with that. It really doesn’t matter how fast you go. It’s all about the journey, “the getting there” bit. Happiness does not sit at the top of the mountain you want to climb. Often some of the best views are on the way up. Or down. Or around. Or sideways.

Watch out, it’s going to get a wee bit philosophical here.

Why writing is shit

I have written a few posts on writing in my life. Some of them I even published. For the most part, they all are rather appreciating towards the art of writing words down. You know, something along the lines “writing down your (way too frequent) thoughts, crazy ideas, wildest dreams, greatest fears and brave imaginations makes you so much richer a person”.

This one, however, is not like that. This one is the opposite. It’s (fucking finally, I’d say) about how difficult, uncomfortable and utterly fucked-up writing is.

And also, how fucking desperately I need it in my life, precisely because it’s so shit.